Archive for June 29th, 2011

So those of you who have read me lately are finding these favorite or top 10 lists.  I started doing them on a women’s group after listening to an Abraham tape.  Esther is described as telling Jerry her top ten favorite things on a given subject.  I loved that idea, so I’ve been doing it daily.  Mine don’t always count to 10, often don’t read like a typical top ten list and have lots of twists, turns and surprises.  I include them now and again here.  Someday I think it would be lovely to compile them all together for myself and see the progress.  Anyway, so here’s today’s.  It’s different, it’s revealing, too and I’m ready for that now.

1.   OMG the pure sense of relief in finally accepting
2.   I was raised by a seriously pathological and exploitive mother (stay with me here :-) )
3.   I don’t have to make excuses anymore
4.   I don’t have to make sense of it either
5.   I feel, know the truth of this
6.   forgiveness is not even relevant
7.   I no longer need my Mother’s love
8.   just as I don’t need water from a dry well
9.   I’m free to be a fully realized me
10. I have everything I need now to fully blossom
11. I picked the very best timing to do neuro-feedback and dream work with a Jungian therapist
12. my Daddy’s dead, I don’t have to worry about dishonoring his smaller self that is no longer here
13. this is about me now
14. I had all the freedom in the world to be who I came here to be but I didn’t know it
15. I let things hold me back
16. they felt important
17. sometimes I wasn’t even conscious of them
18. I am becoming more conscious now
19. I love becoming a more conscious fully integrated human being
20. who came here to be her beautiful Bethie self
21. and now she can be
22. joy is all I have to say, pure utter joy
23. no wait, one more thing
24. EF’ing COOL!!!

Read Full Post »