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Archive for July 21st, 2010

It was the mid 1980s and for the sum total of one evening I thought I was in love with him.  But most of the time we were just very good friends.  His name was Stan Easton.

I was in nursing school.  My schedule was hectic and beyond busy.  Stan called one day.  I wasn’t at home.  I often wondered if things would have been different had I been home to take that call.  A few days later, he ran a tube from his car’s muffler into his bedroom and died.

Before his death, he had trouble sleeping.  I loaned him a Judy Collins album to help him sleep.  On it, Leonard Cohen’s song: Hey, That’s No Way To Say Goodbye.  He still had the album when he died.  What I wanted to say to him then and still do, is exactly that — hey, that’s no way to say goodbye.

Although I fault you not for what you felt you had to do and I imagine your hair upon the pillow in an eternal “sleepy golden storm” … forever there, forever loved, forever remembered.  “You know my love goes with you, as your love stays with me, it’s just the way it changes like the shoreline and the sea.”

I loved you in the morning, our kisses deep and warm,
your hair upon the pillow like a sleepy golden storm,
yes, many loved before us, I know that we are not new,
in city and in forest they smiled like me and you,
but now it’s come to distances and both of us must try,
your eyes are soft with sorrow,
Hey, that’s no way to say goodbye.

I’m not looking for another as I wander in my time,
walk me to the corner, our steps will always rhyme
you know my love goes with you as your love stays with me,
it’s just the way it changes, like the shoreline and the sea,
but let’s not talk of love or chains and things we can’t untie,
your eyes are soft with sorrow,
Hey, that’s no way to say goodbye.

I loved you in the morning, our kisses deep and warm,
your hair upon the pillow like a sleepy golden storm,
yes many loved before us, I know that we are not new,
in city and in forest they smiled like me and you,
but let’s not talk of love or chains and things we can’t untie,
your eyes are soft with sorrow,
Hey, that’s no way to say goodbye.

~Leonard Cohen~

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