Having worked with the 30 day blessing way challenge the last several days, I find that I can’t honestly come by “it’s all a blessing”. Whether I know what the blessing is or defer judgment on it, my heart just isn’t going along for the ride. But here is what I can honestly come by — I am exactly where I am supposed to be. How do I know that? I know I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be because this is where I am! It’s as simple as that. So here I am and I don’t like nor want everything about where I am right now. What am I supposed to do about it? Analyze it, change it, fix it, shift it, intend it differently or my old fall back, blame myself. No, no, none of that.
Supposing instead I meet the moment with — I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be? What if I met all my moments with I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be? Haven’t I been writing about this all along? It’s all ok and I’m ok. Didn’t I say I was giving myself carte blanche to have it all? Didn’t I say it’s ok to have nightmares? I did, I do, and I have. I also said: bring it on! So the Universe has upped the ante and brought it on. Ok, so who are you now, Bethie?
Byron Katie calls it loving what is. I’m not loving what is, I’m loving me and making peace with what is.
Recently I watched the finale for a TV show entitled Flash Forward. It’s the only show I remember seeing that dealt specifically with consciousness. The question it explored was, is it free will or is it fate, or is it some combination of both. Unfortunately the show’s been cancelled but it left behind a message that really said it all to me and I quote it below:
“Sometimes what happens in the world makes us forget. You choose what’s next and you’ll wind up right where you’re supposed to be.”
No right, no wrong — meeting each moment without resistance. Who am I now? This is who I am — meeting each moment with an open, receptive heart knowing I am *exactly* where I am supposed to be.
Love this…love where we both are!!
you are the best sister a girl could ask for!
you warm the cockles of my heart, Sis <3
Beth, while reading your post, it felt to me as if you have simply moved on to a greater level of love and acceptance for yourself regarding this topic. (Which, of course, COULD even be construed as a blessing.) ;)
A short while later, I read the following which seemed to bring even more light and clarity to a process which I believe many of us on a spiritual path go through:
“Others felt that they were experiencing unloved parts of themselves that had finally come to the surface to be recognized and healed through love. People found feelings they had rejected and parts of themselves they had ignored came up to be handled. As they loved and accepted these feelings and parts of themselves – the sad self, the angry self, the lonely self, and so on, the unloved self was healed and the feelings transformed.”
So, congratulations on your forward progress, Beth! I agree that you are “exactly” where you are supposed to be; a marvelously honest, open and loving human being!
It reminds me of what Abraham says, “We never get it wrong and we never get it done. And the reason we never get it wrong is because we never get it done.”
Much love is being sent your way!
Thank you so much Colleen. I definitely feel that this is the core of self love. Self love is all about self solidarity with me. So yes to all of that. It’s another layer, maybe there’s more, maybe there’s endless layers. Or as my friend Terri says, maybe I’ll be 100 and saying the same things and still offering this love of me and meeting many more moments knowing I am exactly where I am supposed to be. Sending much love back to you! xxxxo
I learn more and more from you all the time, and sometimes wonder how we are on the same brain wave.
Self judgement of what I know and what I feel has been a struggle for me, and this fits perfectly into that….
xxome
Thanks Maryellen. We complement each other, that’s with both the “e” and the “i”. Ancient paths that cross once again; we each bring something to the other. Exciting, isn’t it?! I do not however have the sword with the sands of time. :) Maybe you do! xxxooome2
Bravo once again, Bethie! I was reading yesterday in one of my favorite books of all time, “The Joy of Living”, that in Buddhism, one is instructed to “use the poison as the antidote” and by that, to turn all unpleasant thoughts, emotions, and life circumstances into the object of meditation and that, ultimately, even our mental and emotional afflictions are transformative as a meditation or tool for cultivating a deeper identification with ourselves as pure loving awareness. And, if we aren’t being honest, we can’t give ourselves the gift of that transformation..the way they use the “poison as medicine” is not to develop attachment or aversion to what is, but rather to observe it with loving awareness. Then we don’t push anything away and we don’t become attached…or if we do push something away or become attached, we observe ourselves doing that too!
Thus, this brilliant post of yours: “loving me and making peace with what is” is a very advanced stage of developing tranquil abiding which means the ability to be the mind of loving awareness no matter what object it is observing! Also, another term in Tibetan Buddhism is called “Unconditional self friendliness” which means no matter how many times I learn the same lesson, I am going to learn it with kindness towards myself. And each time I learn it, it sinks deeper into the fabric of my Soul.
Did I mention HOW MUCH I LOVE YOUR BLOG???? and you,
Denise
OMG I love this Denise! I’m going to share it with Terri, too, especially the unconditional self friendliness. Wow and the poison as medicine. It reminds me that the way out is the way in, also different but as friendly that the problem is always the solution. I just LOVE this and you Neezie. You are one of my earlier teachers, you taught me, among other things, “if it happened to me, it was meant to be”. I love you, Bethie