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Archive for May 30th, 2010

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Having worked with the 30 day blessing way challenge the last several days, I find that I can’t honestly come by “it’s all a blessing”.  Whether I know what the blessing is or defer judgment on it, my heart just isn’t going along for the ride.  But here is what I can honestly come by — I am exactly where I am supposed to be.  How do I know that?  I know I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be because this is where I am!  It’s as simple as that.  So here I am and I don’t like nor want everything about where I am right now.  What am I supposed to do about it?  Analyze it, change it, fix it, shift it, intend it differently or my old fall back, blame myself.  No, no, none of that.

Supposing instead I meet the moment with — I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be?  What if I met all my moments with I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be?  Haven’t I been writing about this all along?  It’s all ok and I’m ok.  Didn’t I say I was giving myself carte blanche to have it all?  Didn’t I say it’s ok to have nightmares?  I did, I do, and I have.  I also said: bring it on!  So the Universe has upped the ante and brought it on.  Ok, so who are you now, Bethie?

Byron Katie calls it loving what is.  I’m not loving what is, I’m loving me and making peace with what is.

Recently I watched the finale for a TV show entitled Flash Forward.  It’s the only show I remember seeing that dealt specifically with consciousness.  The question it explored was, is it free will or is it fate, or is it some combination of both.  Unfortunately the show’s been cancelled but it left behind a message that really said it all to me and I quote it below:

“Sometimes what happens in the world makes us forget. You choose what’s next and you’ll wind up right where you’re supposed to be.”

No right, no wrong — meeting each moment without resistance.  Who am I now?  This is who I am — meeting each moment with an open, receptive heart knowing I am *exactly* where I am supposed to be.

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