Water Bloom - Soos Creek

Water Bloom – Soos Creek

I went to another Dr. Joe Dispenza workshop this past week up at the Kripalu Yoga Center in western Massachusetts. Clearly I can’t get enough of the guy, his heart, his work, and his message. He has helped me re-tap into the unlimited potential, the greatness, the fullest expression of who I came to be in ways that no one else has.

There is a daily practice and commitment that comes with this work, and part of it includes regular meditation. Meditation has become a surprising source of downloading layers of information from the field that has been valuable for me in my own personal re-awakening.

Before I got to the workshop I meditated in a hotel lobby in Poughkeepsie, on purpose. Meaning —  it’s life, if I need to be in a quiet setting, so I can get quiet and right with myself, well then, how will I ever take this out into the world?

I am even sitting in the hotel bistro meditating where it’s peak breakfast time. I notice while in meditation, that I can hear other people talking. It’s static at first, until I lend it some further attention. Now I can hear their words, their opinions. And as I lend a little more attention to their opinions, I put my whole self in. I’m “all ears”. I hear their opinions, now I begin to form an opinion about their opinions. I am no longer sovereign, I have re-entered the world of the personality, its identity, and what always comes with it — the sense of feeling separate.

But I am meditating, too, right?! Yes, so now I am hit with a flash of inspiration! It IS all really just static. Life is like that, until the very moment I decide to hone in and select something to invest my attention in. Without and until my investment of energy, it holds nothing for me.

You know what that means? Everything, yes my sentient, sovereign beings, everything follows along these simple guidelines. And we know this, right? Until it gets big and important, like say American politics, for instance. Pick your flavor of “big and important”. Personalities love opinions, we bond over them, and we fight over them! Guess how many of these opinions we’re taking with us when we die? Nada. It’s not who we are!!

I have always been moved upon by The Great Potential (we all have), and I’m just not going to live like this isn’t the truth anymore. If I am living a story of limitation (code for opinions, judgments, ideas about what others should be doing, who should be the president, how things should be done, etc.) then I am saying: “You know what God, you tapped me for Great Potential, but I’m gonna pass today. I’m gonna live within this other narrow, *separate* (my God, it’s always separate from LOVE!), and limited focus!”

Ain’t happening here, nope. Not without some conscious awareness on my part. The gig is up, and I am waking up! Putting this into daily practice is the work.

In closing, here’s two great quotes from Dr. Joe this weekend. The first that will stop most in their tracks:

“Just because you’ve been given a diagnosis, doesn’t mean you have to have any of the symptoms.” Ponder that out-of-the-box thought for awhile. One of the tenets of his work is — watch what you “accept, believe and surrender” to.

“Every day trust love over fear.”

For more information on Dr. Joe and his work go to Dr. Joe Dispenza. I get no commissions for this – only the joy of lighting the torches of others, because he sure has lit mine!!

Be well and at peace my unlimited ones … until the next time …


First PNW Forest Bloom February 2016

First PNW Forest Bloom February 2016


Affirmation for the day:

I am a sovereign, sentient* being. No one, no thing can affect my energy without my permission.

Now to put the affirmation to practice. Welcome every opportunity where you give your power away, because it is an opportunity for practice!

Helpful tip: Dr. Joe Dispenza suggests invoking the moniker “change” when you first start down the road with some version of “I don’t like/want/need this.”

Saying “change” is a good idea, but I’d add the breath. Conscious breathing gives you that wee window to make that choice to reaffirm and honor your sovereignty.

Say “change”, like you mean it, even if it’s silent. Then inhale for four seconds, hold it at the top of your head for four seconds, now exhale for another four. The counting with the breath will aid in interrupting any stress chemicals before they get a running start in the body. Repeat as necessary.

Now welcome your opportunities, and the chance to practice a whole new way of being! Change does take practice and commitment.

As this sovereign, sentient being, keep this in mind:

“Understand now — you can no longer complain.” Dr. Joe Dispenza

Bold statement, eh?! Because mostly everybody’s doing it, right?!

What’s wrong with complaining? It’s an outer reality-centric stance. It means you have declared that external circumstances dictate how you think and feel. One can’t be a sovereign, sentient being, and a complainer.

Complaining also says I am a victim of external situations and people. “They” or “it” make me feel such and such.

Complaining also releases stress chemicals in the body, that lead to disorder, illness, and decline in the body.

Yes, it can be hard to change old habits that have a well worn groove. How to change them then? One awareness at a time. Notice where the tendency to complain shows up, and consciously choose to withdraw your attention from it. But this is not a grin and bear it exercise. Won’t change a darn thing that way.

If your choices are to complain or stifle it, then spend more time in meditation or whatever leaves you knowing and feeling the “rapture of being alive”.**

The external world gets way less enticing when what goes on inside is a love affair with your God. You’ll eventually want that more than anything.

*  sentient being can be defined as a consciously aware being
** quote attributed to Joseph Campbell

Dedication & Investment

Cannon Beach - October 2014

Cannon Beach – October 2014


It’s been a very long time since I posted here, after 8 years solid of blogging! And I didn’t even say goodbye or see you later! So here I am — and so happy I have something to share with you today.

Briefly, want to add where I’ve been — I went through a major transition last year. My differently-abled son moved on to adult supported living last spring. I became progressively more ill as the year went by. Thanks to my naturopath, I got back on the right course, and just in time for October of last year. This is when I went to a Dr. Joe Dispenza “Progressive Workshop”, and learned exactly how it is that I made my body sick.

After that workshop true life changes began to take shape. I’ve just attended his next level workshop, the “Advanced”, and this one went even deeper. His work continues to be life changing in ways I never even dreamed possible.

The challenge with blogging about his work though, is it’s not just an intellectual process of gathering information, it has to be felt and experienced. This is achieved through meditation. So it’s been difficult for me to write about his work in a meaningful way. Today I think I have something to share that will be impactful.

About meditation — frankly when I saw him the first time, I thought — love the man’s heart, love his work, but I don’t know about this daily, sitting for long periods, mediation crap. Yet a couple of weeks later, I would come to commit to two days a week of at least 45 minutes of sitting meditation. Within another couple of weeks, I was meditating daily, sometimes multiple times a day. Now, I can’t not do it!

I posted this on my Facebook timeline yesterday, and some people said they really needed to hear it. So I share this now with you all, with the desire that you too, will benefit from it.

Two quotes from the workshop:

“Is the omnipresent always present with you? Is it possible you are not present with it?” (This is the secret benefits of meditation!)

“Stop arguing for your heavy baggage.”

At one point, Dr. Fannin was on stage speaking. He’s a big brain scientist, likes to measure things (I don’t). But he said one thing that I loved:

“How many neurons over a lifetime *dedicated* to worry?” (or fear, or guilt, or limitation of any kind)

I sat up and took notice when he used the word “dedicate”. He did not say spent, because it’s not like you hand over your money and get nothing back. Oh no, this dedication is an *investment* in worry, it’s not useless or wasted energy at all! It’s being used thoroughly, but in all the wrong places.

With that in mind, if you are a stock investor would you invest in a crap stock that signals your body to downgrade itself? Because that’s exactly what happens when we think and blindly surrender to thoughts and feelings that kick out stress chemicals.

We do uniquely have free will, we have a choice about where we direct our attention and therefore energy. Meditation helps with this tremendously. Settling the nervous system back down, time and time again, so we can come to live life in a less reactive, more mindful manner. There’s more benefits to doing his particular brand of meditations, but for now this explanation will suffice.

Now … back to “how many neurons over a lifetime *dedicated* to worry?” So while Dr. Fannin is speaking, I’m writing a rampage of turn arounds, here’s a portion of it.

How about … how many neurons dedicated to …

learning something new?
doing the uncommon?
being surprised by life?
being curious?
feeling vital?
feeling fed by life?
being present?
feeling awed by life?
feeling inspired?
feeling passion?
having a sacred relationship with your God?
feeling in love with life?
being at ease?

Ok, your turn … so much more could be said and *lived* here! …

I love what Wendell Berry writes of in this poem.  A Mother’s love
that is so willing to rest always in love.  No matter what little or big
things come up, that love remains.  In other words, those things
that can come up — she ‘pays it no mind’.

Believing in someone is always a force for the good.  It is to merge
Heaven on Earth, as Wendell Berry brilliantly reflects in this tribute
to his Mother.  Enjoy and Happy Mother’s Day!

Image Locale

To My Mother

I was your rebellious son,
do you remember? Sometimes
I wonder if you do remember,
so complete has your forgiveness been.

So complete has your forgiveness been
I wonder sometimes if it did not
precede my wrong, and I erred,
safe found, within your love,

prepared ahead of me, the way home,
or my bed at night, so that almost
I should forgive you, who perhaps
foresaw the worst that I might do,

and forgave before I could act,
causing me to smile now, looking back,
to see how paltry was my worst,
compared to your forgiveness of it

already given. And this, then,
is the vision of that Heaven of which
we have heard, where those who love
each other have forgiven each other,

where, for that, the leaves are green,
the light a music in the air,
and all is unentangled,
and all is undismayed.


I was so impressed by a Jeff Foster video today, that I sat down to transcribe parts of it for myself and for all of you. He is one of many gifted spiritual teachers who is helping others practice compassionate awareness with self. I am always up for sharing that wisdom with all of you, so that we can all benefit.

Guest: I’ve been on this journey for more than 20 years…and I still hurt.


Jeff Foster: So this word … still — this is a huge one. This is the voice of the mind. After all these years, after all the healing, after all the courses, after all the books, why am I STILL feeling this? That’s one of the big stories of the mind: after all I’ve done, after all my insight, and my clarity, and my healing … why am I STILL feeling this sadness? Why am I still feeling this burning?


This word ‘still’ is very interesting because it implies an expectation. ‘By now’, that’s another way of saying it, isn’t it? By now this should be gone, by now I shouldn’t be feeling this. By now is the big lie. By now, is the great dishonoring of your experience. By now, still, I should be over this by now.


It’s so violent to ourselves, so cruel, so unkind. So quickly we go into the old story – why are you still here? I thought you would be gone by now. I’m so disappointed. Can you feel the self-violence in that? They just come, all they are asking for is to be allowed here now.


We go so quickly into – why are you still here? Seems like such a small thing, but when it comes to the voice of the heart it’s such a huge thing. That’s not the voice of the heart. The heart doesn’t say – why are you still here? The heart says, “aw, you’re here.” There’s no ‘still’, there’s no ‘by now’. There’s only here, there’s only now.


This idea that I should be “free from”. That’s the mind’s version of freedom. These are all your children: rage, doubt, joy, sorrow. They are all your children, and they come to you not to punish, or show you how much you failed, but because you are their home.


Sadness does not want to be healed. It wants to be held … which is the healing ironically. The word heal and whole are from the same root. It wants to be part of the whole.


You are presence. You are home and all these children come to visit you. Sadness will come and visit you, and she’ll leave and come back. If your heart is open, that never has to stop. That’s how you break the cycle of violence.

Back Pocket Wisdom

Image by Rassouli

The words below in quotes are by US Andersen and adapted by Kelly Howell from “The Secret Meditation”.  My comments are sprinkled throughout in italics:

“I know that I am pure in spirit and that I always have been and always will be.”

Breathe in, I am pure in spirit.  Empty the breath into a golden pool immersing you in pure spirit.  Feel what it means to say and feel this about yourself: I am pure in spirit.  Honor whatever comes up and breathe with it.  From the time you were a mere “seed”, you were pure in spirit.  This is a Universal Truth that is an unending, never changing, constant. 

“I am one with Universal Mind and I know this mind is perfect and I may rely upon it for guidance in all of my affairs.”

I am not alone.  I was never really alone, though I could pretend otherwise.  When puzzled for answers, I needn’t try to figure things out all on my own.  I can ask for Divine Guidance at any time.  It is always available to me.  The answers come when I rest in the quiet, open, receptive places.  Actually they come no matter what, but I can’t hear them if I’m not in receiving mode.

“I rely upon this power for guidance in all of my affairs.  I know and recognize my one-ness with all things.  I know that all form and all circumstance are the creation of an Infinite Intelligence that is within and around me.”

By relying upon this power, it leaves my mortal mind with nothing to figure out.  Relying on this power means faith and trust are my constant guides.  Beyond mere words, trust and faith, is the umbilical cord that keeps me continuously connected to Divine Infinite Intelligence.  I take action now when the prompt comes from within, inspired action.

“I know my purpose in life is to reach ever upward and outward to expand in knowledge, and love and unity.  I place my future in Divine hands.  I turn over each problem of my life to that great All Knowing mind to which all things are possible.”

“I am merged with the infinite power of love that surges through me.  The limits and inhibitions of my past are gone and each day is a new birth, another step on my journey towards one-ness with God.  I do not seek, I know.  I do not strive for I am guided.”

How can one not be seduced by: I am merged with the Infinite Power of Love that surges through me?  Doesn’t it make you want to drop everything right now, be still and breathe that precious life giving breath and melt into the arms of Divine Love?  Certain now you are renewed forever lying here, resolve to remember this and return the moment should you ever forget.

This I must repeat:

“The limits and inhibitions

of my past are gone

and each day is a new birth,

another step on my journey

towards one-ness with God.

I do not seek, I know.

I do not strive for I am guided.”

I hope you all enjoyed the writing of US Andersen, Kelly Howell and my comments today.  It moved me to tears.  I plan on printing it, so I can carry it around in my back pocket.


It was a bright and sunny morning when I walked downstairs and saw this, not one but four 16 oz. glasses, all of which had held milk on the kitchen countertop. My son had consumed them all that morning. Never underestimate the ways in which an awakening can come.

Some background, my son is a 19 yo differently-abled person. A healthy impulse you may have to inhibit or choose what is most personally beneficial, my son does not always have ready access to this.

But back to the glasses. This is important because it’s 20 years of exposure to “A Course in Miracles” and never quite grasping the material fully. So I decided to pick up the workbook lessons from the VERY beginning.

When I got to Lesson 7: I see only the past  ___________. This is when I was graced with a direct experience of the lesson.

I walked downstairs to the morning dishes and I saw four of those 16oz. glasses, with pools of milk drying at their bottoms. I did not see four glasses of milk as if I had never seen them before. Instead, I felt: “Oh no, not again. I can’t take this anymore. When will it stop?” Followed by “I’m so burnt out”.  Every single one of those statements were rooted in the past! And burnout cannot exist without a past, a story, a history, a chain of pain!!

I had a lot of opinions about the empty milk glasses discovery that morning. But just then I said: “I see only the past in this glass.” And all the inner commentary stopped to give way to a broader wisdom.

Seeing the past in this glass was a gateway to seeing just how often thoughts limit me (and even those I love), thoughts imbued with only the meaning I give them. Everything I saw in the glass was the past – the sense of being tired, burnt out. These are constructs of the past that have to be fed regularly to keep the untruth of them going. But if all we have is right here and now, and I’m not fully here, then I’m locked in the past.

Lately, I spend my days checking the credentials of every thought that wants to get a foot in the door, aka scare me, or cause suffering – as soon as I hear their inner commentary – I affirm the truth: I have no neutral thoughts. None of us do actually.

Would you like to know what’s well beyond self-limiting “not neutral thoughts”? I sure did. Even though the Course compels us not to fill the void, I feel a sense of what has to be beyond the limitation, the human propensity to assign meaning to everything. It has to be that all knowing, all encompassing field of infinite potentialities. This is God, Source, Spirit, All That Is.

Still learning and sprouting my wings, but will say “I have no neutral thoughts” is a very powerful exercise to practice during the day. And if you would like to do the daily lessons, many websites and apps now support this.

Be well and at peace my friends.