Time has a wonderful way of weeding out the trivial.  ~Richard Ben Sapi

Quite true, don’t you think?  This goes along with a question I have written on one of my homemade well being cards:

Will it matter in a year from now?

There are less than a handful of times I’ve come to that question and been able to answer – yes, it will matter.  Even then the truth is, circumstances will change and I will change.  I believe what Florence Scovel Shinn has written – only good lies before me.  Then, what’s the worry?!

So Beth, tell me, what IS the worry?  Hmmm, don’t have one anymore!

Thanks for listening to this quick little interaction in my head!  May all your troubles be small ones and if not, then may you know you are transformed by them.  Life will sometimes take us into the obscure, as yet to be defined or understood places.   Remember, though, the butterfly always emerges from the darkened chrysalis flying openly into the light.  When daybreak surfaces from the cloak of night, we are those butterflies.  And with a tiny flap of our wings, we send ripples of hope across the globe.

Posted this almost exactly a year ago and stumbled on it again just the other day.  I love my own sweet voice of wisdom here.  It reminded me that though I had moments where I thought I had lost everything I know deep down, it was never really lost to begin with.  It was right here all along.  I guess I do have those ruby slippers after all!

This is not always the jolliest season for everyone.  For those of you feeling some level of holiday blues, may you find some comfort here…

Sadness is present.  It was one of my former mentors who instructed us to state it just like that, in lieu of: I am sad. The ‘I am’ statement being one that married or joined you to sadness.

It’s just that ‘sadness is present’ has a sound akin to taking roll in class where Sadness sheepishly answers from the back row, “present”.  I wish that all my Sadnesses were in the back row, sheepish and barely audible.  Yet this one feels as if it’s in the front row and it’s cleared out the entire row for itself.

Actually, I am hoping that Sadness takes a bathroom break because Mischief has plans.  The plan is to stick a big thick wad of gum on Sadness’ seat.  That way when the bell rings, Sadness will be stuck there.  Ah, well now, Mischief has just been nudged by Wisdom and Kindness.  They say,  “All our emotions have a place here.”  “But why does Sadness have to take up an entire front row?” I argue.

“It wants to be noticed and embraced like Humor is.  It wants to see you welcome it the way you do when Joy bounces in the room.  It wants to see your face light up the way it does when Surprise and Delight saunter in.  It wants to be acknowledged just for who it is, not shunned.  It wants to be first-picked to play in the game, not last.  It takes up an entire row just to tell you, it has a right to be here.  And while you have a right to ignore Sadness, in doing so, you lose out on the full technicolor experience of living.”

Mischief never did put that wad of gum on Sadness’ seat.  Eventually Sadness sat in the center of the room, surrounded, embraced even, by all emotion.  There was one day in particular when the whole class voted on the Emotion of the Quarter.  Everyone picked Sadness.  Sadness, flanked by all its Friends, beamed with pride as it accepted the award.  It never sat alone in the back again nor cleared out an entire front row.  It was content to simply Be.

Joni Mitchell wrote a song “For Free” many years ago.  It was the song
about the sax (?) player, playing on a noisy street corner.  A song of how
everyone passed his music by.  That song left an indelible imprint, a resolve
in me to take less for granted.  I wanted to notice, to appreciate and to savor more.

This is also probably the number one tool that could get someone out
of a mild depression.  Just to make it your only job to look, to listen, to observe
the beauty and the wonder that abounds.

Did you know the average healthy mature oak tree has over 200.000 leaves?
That’s a lot of appreciation to go around.  And when they drop they give nutrients
to the soil, it’s a double dipper appreciation!

No one has counted the needles of a redwood but they produce over 100,000 cones a year, thus a single tree can produce over ten million seeds annually.  That’s one Fertile Myrtle (though technically not in the Myrtle family :))

For Free.

The air, your breath, your thoughts, your feelings, your talents, your beating heart
16 trillion behind-the-scenes processes in your body ….

For Free.

receiving and giving love, adoring anything or anyone for a millisecond or a life time
The man on the street corner strumming his guitar
a thank you, with the flesh of a palm reaching out to another palm
unexplained synchronicities and explained ones too
hugs and kisses

For Free.

the smells of freshly cooked food
the admiration for the time and talent that went into that food
including the appreciation for the plants and animals that provided this nourishment

For Free.

Your body as your temple
The song of the meadowlark in the distance
or the song of crisp clean sheets snapping across the air
the shore seagulls scurrying for fresh food at low tide
the water of which we are made
and the formlessness to which we return

What about love?

Deeply, passionately enamored with something, anything

Love will find you in the innocence of night and re-kindle that spark

The very scent of desire wafts about your nose and beckons you to come hither

Now from behind you, you hear the slow steady insistent beat of a rhythm

You’ve heard this rhythm before, it’s the one that calls you out towards being something more

You breathe in sync to the rhythm with this river of breath and it pulls you in so slowly, so seductively

You can no longer contain it, deny or delay it.

This is what you came here for, to ride the wings of desire, to gallop across a sky and paint it with the rainbows of your heart’s desire

Now when you lose touch with this passion, remember this place,
be ever faithful to your heart’s calling.

It is as vast as infinity and as wide as your love for it.

After the storm, a rainbow comes – someone has painted their glory across the sky.

They say don’t die with your music still in you.

I say don’t die with your heart’s desires still in you.

Could there be a more powerful question?!  What would love do?

Those who read regularly know I make my own “well being cards”.  I usually take different colored index cards and use brightly colored inks to write inspiring quotes.  One of my favorites, inspired by A Course in Miracles, is – what would innocence do?  But frankly – what would love do? – feels even more powerful.

I recently had a situation where a contract cancellation has had a huge impact on my life, and I shot off a couple of emails in response to this.  I kept it pretty much to just the facts of how this cancellation had a personal effect on things.  But, you know, there was still some finger pointing blame in it.  That’s not my style and it’s bugged me ever since I wrote that last email.

I asked myself – what would love do?  Love would speak the truth of those emails, I was feeling the victim of circumstances and wanting to blame someone and I apologize.  The flip side of victim is always victimizer.  It may have been subtle, but I was a victim, victimizing with my finger wagging.  Basically underlying it all, was a “shame on you”.   Perhaps I felt even more justified that I was writing to a government agency.  Yet, there are real people with hearts in those agencies, just as there is everywhere.

When I bring love to the table of my life, it stands apart from feeling out of control and the actions that flow out of feeling loss of control.   It provides ample space to bring true compassion to every situation.  And speaking of tables, as we approach Thanksgiving, let me remember that love is Spirit’s nourishment.  I would love to place a dish at the Thanksgiving table with just love in it.  Any one care for a spoonful of loving?!

My deep gratitude today to Laurie C. P., for sharing a promo for the documentary “May I Be Frank”, which inspired this post and touched me deeply today.

here on planet autumn

every success and every seeming failure is applauded
no bigger, no better, no smaller, no lesser
you see, it is all life’s treasure expressing itself

and even if a little seedling never quite pushes through to survive
that is glorified and celebrated as life’s gift to us
it is enough
no bigger, no better, no smaller, no lesser

everything wants to come to fruition and fruition has many levels
just witnessing life for a singular moment
asks you to come to it willingly, yes willing indeed
to see the precious glory within it.

here, on Planet Autumn, patience is not a virtue
move as an inchworm or a rocket ship
no bigger, no better, no smaller, no lesser

other edicts: waste not, want not
you won’t find them here
Even just an inner desire that never meets paper and pen,
is a song of praise on your lips
It’s yours and yours alone, and
it is enough.

You will find life brimming from its very essence, here on Planet Autumn.
And you will hear, ever so delicately, the song of exaltation to
The Great One, painted on every single leaf

Keep the song of praise always on your lips,
this is true wealth that can never be taken from you.

Evening falls now on Planet Autumn, while you are sleeping,
angels come and paint the song of praise on your lips.
And they whisper in your ear of your preciousness.

Come, here, listen.

Sometimes I wish I could drive inside of autumn, not up to it, not to its borders, not by it, not near it, not walking through it, but *IN* it.  I want to enter the autumnal world; surely it has its own planet.  This world where there is only autumn and I just let it surround and engulf me.

Here, the richness and layers of yellows, and golds, and reds, and burgundies and oranges and so many shades in between.  The light slanting down on the colors just so; it will make your heart weep.  This perfect beautiful, striking, flaming world where there is no concern about the stock market, occupying Wall Street, today’s economy, Obama’s gray hair.  Ha!  My gray hair!

My utopian autumnal world does exist.  I know, for a brief moment today I was there.

“I could care less.”  It’s an interesting phrase, isn’t it?  Often used as sort of a flippant response to information that you’ve just received.   But the actual words contradict the intention behind uttering them.  In essence, one is actually saying that you *could* care less.  And this is where I begin, in caring too much and caring less.

Within the system of the Chinese Elements, there is the element of earth, yin and yang earth.  Yin earth is the archetype of Mother.  It’s the mother’s job to care, to nurture and to support.  This is a big part of who I am, yin earth, it’s in my core destiny, which is revealed in my birth date via the 9 star ki.  It’s also revealed in the shapes and curves of my particular facial features.

Every element has a front and a back, challenges and strengths.  We don’t get to choose just the strengths, but we do get to choose how we evolve through both the strengths and challenges.

Among the Mother’s or yin earth’s challenges:  caring too much to the point of excessive worry, worst case scenario type thinking, meddling in other people’s right and responsibility to figure things out for themselves, and trouble with just saying no sans the – omg, I said no, what will they think of me now – guilt hangover.  If I’m being completely frank here, welcome to my world!

My girl friend told me she was starting a 30 day process of caring less.  Caring less, is not to be without caring, but to care without the suffering.  This really piqued my interest.  When she feels overtly concerned about something, she tells herself – she could care less about this, and then finds and inhabits the feeling place in the body of caring less.  I would add breathe into the feeling place as if it’s a gentle wave lifting you up and carrying you into that sweet place of relief.

The next morning after she and I talked, I woke up and lay in bed.  This seems to be a time when I most kick into worry, worst-case scenario mode, followed by how-can-I-fix-this mode.  Truth is 99% of my worst-case scenario thinking a) either never comes true or b) is what 12 step calls stinkin’ thinkin’.  It’s just not true, period.  The other truth, if there’s any fixing to be done, unless I’ve got the power to spin the planets today (I checked, I don’t) get out of the way and let something far greater than me, reveal the greater picture.

And that leads me back to what I did that morning of worry.  I said to myself, I could care less, took a deep breath and imagined myself as if I was a camera with my focus up as close as it could possibly be.  Then I brought the focus back, back, back, as far as it could get.  Here, I could breathe even easier.

Another friend of mine once explained it as looking at a beautiful quilt hanging on a wall. Walk up to it and press your nose into one tiny square of that quilt, the beauty is lost in a blur, your nose hurts and you can’t breathe very well either :). Step back several feet and you can see the entire image of that tapestry we call life, clearly.

That tapestry is what’s mine and mine alone to live and experience. It’s as unique as my fingerprint and it has my fingerprints all over it. And something else is all over it, the hands of Divine Wisdom, carrying me every step of the way, even when I think I’m the only one with my hands on the levers of life.

The words below in quotes are by US Andersen and adapted by Kelly Howell from “The Secret Meditation”.  My comments are sprinkled throughout in italics:

“I know that I am pure in spirit and that I always have been and always will be.”

Breathe in, I am pure in spirit.  Empty the breath into a golden pool immersing you in pure spirit.  Feel what it means to say and feel this about yourself: I am pure in spirit.  Honor whatever comes up and breathe with it.  From the time you were a mere “seed”, you were pure in spirit.  This is a Universal Truth that is an unending, never changing, constant. 

“I am one with Universal Mind and I know this mind is perfect and I may rely upon it for guidance in all of my affairs.”

I am not alone.  I was never really alone, though I could pretend otherwise.  When puzzled for answers, I needn’t try to figure things out all on my own.  I can ask for Divine Guidance at any time.  It is always available to me.  The answers come when I rest in the quiet, open, receptive places.  Actually they come no matter what, but I can’t hear them if I’m not in receiving mode.

“I rely upon this power for guidance in all of my affairs.  I know and recognize my one-ness with all things.  I know that all form and all circumstance are the creation of an Infinite Intelligence that is within and around me.”

By relying upon this power, it leaves my mortal mind with nothing to figure out.  Relying on this power means faith and trust are my constant guides.  Beyond mere words, trust and faith, is the umbilical cord that keeps me continuously connected to Divine Infinite Intelligence.  I take action now when the prompt comes from within, inspired action.

“I know my purpose in life is to reach ever upward and outward to expand in knowledge, and love and unity.  I place my future in Divine hands.  I turn over each problem of my life to that great All Knowing mind to which all things are possible.”

“I am merged with the infinite power of love that surges through me.  The limits and inhibitions of my past are gone and each day is a new birth, another step on my journey towards one-ness with God.  I do not seek, I know.  I do not strive for I am guided.”

How can one not be seduced by: I am merged with the Infinite Power of Love that surges through me?  Doesn’t it make you want to drop everything right now, be still and breathe that precious life giving breath and melt into the arms of Divine Love?  Certain now you are renewed forever lying here, resolve to remember this and return the moment should you ever forget.

This I must repeat:

“The limits and inhibitions

of my past are gone

and each day is a new birth,

another step on my journey

towards one-ness with God.

I do not seek, I know.

I do not strive for I am guided.”

I hope you all enjoyed the writing of US Andersen, Kelly Howell and my comments today.  It moved me to tears.  I plan on printing it, so I can carry it around in my back pocket.

~Kelly Howell~
Living Prayers

Know that you walk a sacred path, welcome yourself as if you invited your most treasured, precious loved one on this journey.  This treasured friend is you.  You are fully supported by Divine Love and carried through life in ways that no mortal could ever provide.  Warmth and comfort permeates your entire being.  So much has come before you to prepare this moment just for you.  Rest here, know how deeply you are nurtured, supported, cared for and loved.  It’s there for you to tap into for all of time.  This is the fortune, the gifts bestowed upon all of us.  Our only job is to softly open and receive.